Gorilla Glue & the Science of Sex

Gorilla Glue & the Science of Sex

Sex is one of the most powerful things God ever created.  It’s like dynamite!  But like dynamite, sex has the potential to both build and destroy — depending on how you use or abuse it.  I wonder what God would say if you asked Him the following question: “What did you make sex for?”  I think He’d probably answer that question with something like this:

“I made sex as my wedding present for you.  I made it with all of the most beautiful things I could imagine.  I made it to deeply bond you and your spouse together emotionally so that you would have some extra glue to hold your relationship together.  I’m rooting for you!  Use this emotional glue I gave you wisely.”

Can it Really be Casual?

Interestingly enough, our culture encourages – almost demands – that we open God’s wedding gift early.  It urges us to rip off the wrapping paper, and remove the bow before it’s time.  Yet the consequences for this mistake are obvious to anyone who is willing to take an honest look — or to anyone who has experienced non-committal, “casual” sex firsthand.  Science has something to say about the very real downsides to this sexual “freedom,” and the results are anything but comical or “casual.”  Ever heard of Gorilla Glue?  Try sticking your body parts around town with this insanely strong glue and see how it feels when you rip away from the things you attach yourself to.  Trust me: it’s not going to be fun.  Welcome to a life of abusing glue.

The Science of Sex

So now it is time to look at the science of sex — to get a look at the emotional “glue” that God has created sex to generously apply to the hearts of those involved.  When people engage in sexual activity, three particular relevant chemicals are released.  Here is a description of the effects of each of these chemicals on you when you choose to have sex.

Chemical #1: Dopamine  (Produces Feelings of Pleasure)

  • Dopamine produces feelings of euphoria and pleasure.  The reward of sex.
  • Sense of well-being.

Chemical #2: Oxytocin  (Creates Deep Emotional Bonds)

  • Oxytocin is released during childbirth, and it helps cement the strong bond between mother and baby.
  • This chemical is released during sex, and it creates the desire for further contact with the individual who incited its release.
  • This chemical is key to connecting and bonding with your partner.
  • Oxytocin increases levels of empathy, which then lowers our defenses and makes us trust the person more.
  • This chemical deepens feelings of attachment and makes couples feel much closer to one another after they have had sex.
  • Woman produce far more of this hormone.  This means women are more likely to let their guard down and fall in love with a man after sex.
  • Men produce far less Oxytocin than women.
  • Oxytocin helps bond and maintain bonds even if there is no good sense to other aspects of the relationship.  One can remain blind to these faults if Oxytocin is maintained.
  • The body can’t distinguish whether the person we are with is a casual fling or marriage material – Oxytocin is released either way.

Chemical #3: Vasopressin  (Create the Strong Desire for Exclusivity)

  • Vasopressin is the “protection drug.”
  • This chemical kicks in during and after sex to support feelings of possession and the desire to thwart anyone else from taking possession.
  • This chemical plays an important role in aiding long-term commitment.

Gorilla Glue and You

We so often abuse sex because it feels good — we lust for the Dopamine rush.  But afterwards we are left with the mess of the internal consequences we feel inside and cannot deny.  These consequences include: a beat up conscience (due to our sin against God’s purpose and will); feelings of emotional bonding to someone we aren’t committed to (the Oxytocin wound); the desire for exclusivity to someone who will soon move on to sexual intimacy with others (the Vasopressin wound).  You cannot Gorilla Glue yourself to something and then rip yourself away without damage.  So next time the opportunity arises to abuse sex for the Dopamine rush, maybe you should think twice.


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